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Thanks for your post, Estelle... sm

Posted by Easyrider on October 07, 2010 at 23:18:44:

In Reply to: Hi Easyrider. :) sm posted by Estelle on October 07, 2010 at 22:18:22:

We are studying the life of David. Last night the group leader simply did an introduction to this new course of study, which will take 10 weeks, and he has already touched on some things that I'd never thought about before. The one thing that really spoke to me was that David was a really screwed up guy. He had an affair with a married woman and even had her husband killed. Still, God loved David and only saw the good in him. This is because David repented from his heart.

I have done some things in my past that I have repented for but still carry the guilt because these were very bad things, things that have hurt others deeply and some might say even ruined lives. I just can't shake the guilt. But when I realize that God forgave David and didn't even see those sins anymore, it gives me hope. It even makes me excited that maybe I can be a "Godly woman." I was raised in church and then as a young adult drifted away and did anything I wanted to do, but I always held firm to my faith deep in my heart. Now I am making my way back. One reason I have not come back sooner is because I know that local people know the things I've done and I was afraid they'd look at me and basically laugh, thinking I could not have changed. Maybe this is one reason what my DSIL said really hurt me. It's exactly what I feel others might think about me if they know my past. But I know in my heart that I have changed. I really want to strive to be the person God wants me to be, and I'm taking the steps to become that person now regardless of what others think.

Later this afternoon, my DD came to me and apologized for what DSIL said and blamed it on his being an ass. LOL. He's a man, and they often are. I can let it go. I just wanted someone to acknowledge that what he said was wrong and that I am entitled to my beliefs.

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