In Reply to: I'm afraid I don't understand what you are asking. posted by sm on September 21, 2010 at 19:01:47:
: I still think very often people get the person and their actions mixed up.
: Like I said, you can love a person but hate what they do. Sometimes it makes it feel like you don't like them, like you can't stand them, when you really do love them but it is what they are doing you don't like.
: I used to feel like I hated my son, honest to God, because he was doing drugs and all of the things that went along with it. It went beyond dislike, I swear, I thought I hated him.
: I learned in recovery that I didn't hate him, I hated his drug use, I hated his behavior, but I didn't hate him. But you sure could have fooled me until I learned to separate the action I hated from the person I loved.
: I really don't know the situation to which you are referring. I can see thinking you dislike someone enough to tell them you dislike them but claim to love them if you are not able to separate the fact that you dislike something they are doing.
: It is pretty hard to stop loving someone, but it is real easy to dislike what they do.
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